Criminal Girls: spanking game for PSP

Sometimes video games flirt the forbidden, edging into the soft porn territory. Sometimes, they’re just… soft porn. “Criminal Girls” by Nippon Ichi is an RPG in which you guide seven girls (each with her own deadly sin) through hell, trying to help redeem them.

As you lead your team into battles, it turns out that the girls have minds of their own, and from time to time will disobey your commands, or ignore you completely. Here’s where your usual game arsenal is significantly improved with spanking. To train up your team, you must spank them regularly, which improves their obedience, and ultimately helps get them out of hell.

So, by spanking the girls, you’re helping. And winning the game. Yes.

Now, from the game trailer it doesn’t look like the spanking is particularly explicit, though maybe they’ve limited what they show in the trailer. And frankly, the game looks pretty dire. Pretty, but dire.

But you can’t beat soft porn for PSP, can you?

“Whiplash”: upcoming web series

For those of us who enjoy watching web-series and indulging in kink – or indulging in web-series and watching kink – here’s an interesting-looking upcoming web drama.

Whiplash is an edgy web series that chronicles the adventures of Erin Byrne, a strong and independent woman struggling to gain acceptance in life.

Erin comes from a difficult background with an abusive father. As a result of growing up in an atmosphere of family violence, her life has been a series of unfulfiling jobs and bad relationships.

Then, in one moment, her entire life changes.

A chance meeting with a professional dominatrix entices Erin into the world of fetish, where she hopes to finally be appreciated for her strength and to  gain an upper hand on life.  Lured by a promise of wealth and respect, Erin can’t imagine the intrigue and drama that await her.

Along the way, Erin (as Lady Bronwyn) gains insight into her own relationships with love, power and trust as she embraces her new family in the world of kink. Will Erin find the light of contentment she seeks by diving into a world considered by many to be dark, or will this be a path that will lead to her undoing?

I must admit, I have *huge* problems with the premise.

Firstly, don’t get me started on childhood trauma and subsequent interest in kink. Yes, it’s not unknown, but it’s not as common as fictional kinksters will have us believe. There could be so many interesting reasons why somebody may turn out to be kinky (including “I don’t know why, I just am!”), so many backgrounds for the main character. Falling back on the Bad Father trope smacks of lazy character creation.

Then, BDSM as the cure for all your life’s problem is a dodgy concept. Your dad is an arshole? Your boss is worse? Your best friend is after your dog? There are rats in your kitchen? It’ll all be OK when you take up a job in an extremely vulnerable profession which requires sanity, focus and having your shit together. Umm.

Of course, the creators of the show may have huge sneaky grins on their faces as they lull us into complacency with a pedestrian premise, ready to blow us away with amazing writing that subverts all tropes and pokes holes in presumptions. Maybe.

Be that as it may, I’m looking forward to “Whiplash” getting funding and actually posting some episodes.

Enter a 1871 brothel

Do you speak French? Even a little bit? If you do, I’ve got an interesting new period drama for you to follow: “Maison Close” on Canal Plus in France. It starts airing tonight at 8:50pm French time, but I’m sure the Internet will provide if you want to see it.

Set in a luxury Parisian brothel in 1971, it follows the lives of 3 of its inhabitants.

The beautiful official website has been causing something of a stir: as you click in, you’re shown around the brothel by Madam Hortense, who then informs you that you need to pay for your visit. You can pay by either sending some Facebook friends to the site, or actually becoming one of the prostitutes. If you choose the latter option, you’re given a thorough intimate examination, and then you can earn the money on your back, in glorious FLV animation.

You can also explore the brothel, chat to the girls, and see clips from the series. My French is quite feeble, but I’ve had a lot of fun on the website.

If you watch it, come back and tell me if the series is as good as the website!

Chelsea Handler spanked by Akon and Pharrell

The chat-show host Chelsea Handler seems to have a patented brand of naughtiness going on in her interviews. For example, see this interview with the singer Akon, where she encourages him to spank her (at 3:59):

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/2163340/

A short time later Ms Handler is interviewing Pharrell, and brings up the Akon spanking, clearly with a view to get another smack, which she does (in the final minute or so):

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/yt-t5QAfTGVxuo/

To be honest, I’m not keen to sift through the recordings of her show on YouTube looking for more, but I wonder if she’s going to turn the spanking into some sort of signature thing on her show?

Jerry Lewis offers to spank Lindsay Lohan

I don’t really know who Jerry Lewis is – he’s from another time, another continent. But I’m amused that he’s apparently significant enough that his offer to deliver a spanking to Lindsay Lohan ended up on the news.

ABC reports that Lewis said in an interview that “if Lohan doesn’t straighten up he’ll put her over his knee and spank her.” He offers to extend the same treatment to Paris Hilton, as well.

I’ve seen similar sentiments in the spankosphere over the years from people less newsworthy than Mr Lewis, but these remarks haven’t been mentioned on news websites. Maybe the difference is that Lewis ever-so-chivalrously offers to “smack her in the mouth” in addition to the spanking?

I have to say, much though I would enjoy the thought (and the inevitable paparazzi shots) of Lindsay Lohan spanked, I sincerely hope that it’s not at the hands of somebody who has this much disdain for her. That’s just icky.