From the mail bag

Posted on January 27, 2010 · in Rants, Raves and Reviews

I always get plenty of silly comments and emails, but this week has been particularly fruitful. Is it full moon? Is it a winter freeze in the brains?

These wonders are just from the last three days:

“have sex with me” – Yep, that’s the entire comment. On a post from 2006. Imagine this guy’s surprise if I suddenly responded, “sure, let’s have sex. Let’s have sex today“.

“Wow this must hurt, why not shoot normal porn movies instead, it doesn’t hurt?” – I dunno… ’cause maybe I want “it” to hurt? Did you think that maybe becoming a spanking model was an informed choice? Thanks for your concern, and everything.

“Do you do private sessions? I’m in North Carolina.” – Even if I did private sessions (which might happen some time), it would get pretty expensive to fly me to North Carolina, mate. Usually, if somebody asks me about one-to-ones, I can recommend a girl who does do them, but how extensive do you think my network is?

Then there’s a long, detailed email from somebody who wants to shoot a spanking movie with me, but he wants to use a stationery camera on a tripod, do the spanking himself, and he doesn’t have a website to distribute the film. Explain to me, please, how this is not actually a one-to-one.

“Ur not normal.” – Nope. You got it right, girl. I’m not normal. Neither are my friends. We get together and have not-normal tea parties.

I’m hesitant to hit “publish” on this post, in case another juicy piece of mail comes in just as I post. Ah, well…

Comments

8 Responses to “From the mail bag”

  1. Bigjay on January 28th, 2010 7:31 am

    not-normal teaparties… I am suddenly wondering, what do you serve at one of those? And how?

    And yes, that’s just one of your readers being very silly.

  2. Zugzwang on January 28th, 2010 8:51 am

    I’m picturing you and maybe Pandora and Leia-Ann, sitting around a table and having abnormal tea, complete with bizarre sugar and aberrant milk, deviant scones with anomalous clotted cream and eldritch strawberry jam, and maybe even some uncanny Battenberg.

  3. Adele on January 28th, 2010 9:14 am

    Aberrant milk!!!

  4. Pandora on January 28th, 2010 8:22 pm

    Isn’t that what they’ve just made illegal in Australia? ;)

  5. Adele on January 28th, 2010 8:22 pm

    Bad girl. No pervy crumpets for you. :-P

  6. Pandora on January 28th, 2010 8:29 pm

    That’s alright, I’ve got my own supply of freaky ginger cake. *hoards*

  7. Zille Defeu on January 28th, 2010 10:53 pm

    When I’m in the UK next, can we have a “not-normal tea party,” please?! ;)

  8. Zugzwang on January 29th, 2010 5:24 am

    Where will you get eldritch jam?

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